Michael Nilsson feels guilt and shame

VIERSEN/STAFFANSTORP - Swedish billiards giant Michael Nilsson has to cancel for this week's World three cushion championships for national teams in Viersen. The billiards champion, who just turned 54, is feeling bad, has relapsed into addiction and is in a fight to get clean again. ‘’I feel so bad now, I can't play billiards, for now I want to fight back’’, he says in the days before the start of the Nations World championship, in which he has won the world title six times with Torbjörn Blomdahl and the European title once.

The Swede wants to tell his story to let the billiard world know how disappointed he is in himself and why he had to cancel the World championship. Michael: ’’,I want to let everyone know that alcohol is a terrible disease. With this interview, I want to show people that I am not shrugging my shoulders and want to do everything to get well again. It may take months, or even years, but I won't play again until the day I feel better. The most important thing now is to focus on my health and my family.‘’

In his turbulent life with great billiard successes, Michael Nilsson was previously addicted to alcohol. He fought his way back, returned as a billiard player, recovered and was clean for 12 years. ’’I was doing well, but last year in August, during the Nordic championship, I started drinking again. Not so much at first, but at the end of last year it got worse and worse. Alcohol is like a drug for me, I just want more and more.‘’

The Swede feels bad now, both physically and mentally. ‘’I have so much pain in my body for all the people I have hurt. When my ex-girlfriend called me, I still denied, but at the end I admitted that I started drinking again. I have to say: if Anna hadn't called me, I might have been dead, because at the end I was drinking very much.‘’

Michael Nilsson embarked on the journey to get clean again with great ambition. ‘’I go to AA meetings as often as I can, that's my medicine. Anna and I are very good friends, she puts her hands out for me to help me in this journey. And also Rebecka and Jennifer, my eldest daughters and my big sister and brother both put out their hands for me. I have the support of the people closest to me.‘’

He took the decision not to play the World championship in Viersen with Sven Junghaven from the Swedish federation. ‘’I told him I was afraid I would go drinking in Viersen. He thought it was better for the Swedish chances that I would play, but better for my health that I stayed at home. I made that decision ten days ago.‘’

Michael Nilsson, no billiards, no Worlds in Viersen for the time being. ''I want to focus on my health and my family.''

Torbjörn Blomdahl will now play at the World championship with Nalle Olsson. The Swedes play in the group with Vietnam, the titleholder, Belgium and Jordan.